Nathan Bransford is holding a contest where you are to write a diary entry in the voice of a teenager. I entered, but noticed some problems with mine that I didn’t catch until after I hit enter. Which really stinks, because I read it 15 times before submitting. Fart. I’ve fixed them here.
Anyway, here is mine. I’m bleeping out some language I used just in case. Never know how many third grade students might decide to google their teacher. ;-)
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January 4, 2010
Ben hates me. We’re talking hard-core loathing here. It wasn’t like I meant to post those pictures on Facebook. In truth, a ninja jumped through my window and started throwing all sorts of crazy ninja stars at me. He used his mad persuasion skills to force me to upload them. Girl Scouts honor. The tagging and the tweets for people to go look at them was all me, though. I’ll admit it.
But Ben so deserved it. Lying, cheating, a**hole. A smart person wouldn’t leave pictures of themselves in their tighty-whiteys on their ex’s hard drive, especially if they decided to cheat on her with some sl*tty sophomore. They most certainly wouldn’t leave them if they were also wearing high heels and shaking their a** at the camera on a dare. People might start making assumptions.
Totally his fault, when you look at it that way, right?
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Just in case you were wondering, this was totally fabricated, okay? No truth in it what-so-ever!! I swear. No seriously, Facebook wasn’t even around when I was in high school. And that makes me feel old.
I did find my old Jr. High journal in which I professed my love for my now husband (he barely even knew I existed until I was 16). He won’t let me throw it away, either, the bum.
I love your diary entry! Love vindictive heroines, especially when the ex-es deserve it. :D
I think it’s great. :) What mistakes did you think you made?
Thanks! :)
I left out the word ‘and’ and I changed the tense of a word. The last mistake wasn’t that big of a deal because it read okay either way, but the ‘and’ was pretty noticeable. Oh well!
I still think this is hilarious and awesome–WOOT! Good luck! :)
Aw, Amanda — I think it’s hilarious! Good luck with Nathan’s contest!
That was awesome, lol. I was dying when I read about the Ninja stars. Great job!
My first visit to your blog. Love the pict, BTW. I really like this teaser – dude got what he deserved. Hope you win!
Thanks for the heads up on this! I cooked up a short little thing and entered myself. I’m just afraid mine came across as emo. I’ll slap it up on my blog tomorrow.
So didn’t see the high heels coming in this one. Good job!
Thanks all!
And looking forward to reading it, Donna!
Naughty third grade teacher! :) I hope my Year 1s don’t any of my stuff lol. Your second paragraph made me laugh. Good luck!!
Good luck winning the contest! I’m sure there will be a ton of entries, but I like the flow of yours and that it’s current (Facebook) and that it actually reads like a diary entry. Good luck!
Okay, so I’m totally centering in on the wrong thing here, but I love how you said “fart.” So totally natural. I wish I had a teacher like you when I was in 3rd grade. :)
I just realized I said “totally” twice. Duh. Now I sound like a teenager!
Thanks, Julie! You like, totally made me, like, smile! Totally! :-P